Archive for the ‘Life’ Category

I was going to do a blogpost about this myself, but PariahPottyMouth said it so well. Click on the title link below for the full article:

13 Sexist Things About HeforShe; Everything Sexist About Emma Watson’s UN Speech

UN Women's "HeForShe" VIP After Party

1. The name of the campaign, HeforShe.

2. Feminism insults men for years and then asks for their help.

3. She WANTS to USE men and boys for feminism.

4. OK with man-hating, not OK with people saying feminism is about man hating

5. Using personal stories just shows more gender bias.

6. No empathy or understanding on how feminism hurts others

7. Men’s Right’s are not human rights

8. She is an elitist, not an oppressed woman.

9. Granting men a “formal invitation” to serve the feminist party

10. Men are oppressed because women are not granted their human rights

11. Feminists define masculinity and perpetuate stereotypes

12. The LGBT Community does not exist.

13. Men and boys are not human.

I wanted to present someone who is a very good and contemporary picture of why “good” men have such a hard time later in life keeping a wife. I wanted to show everyone that we are watching the Red Pill principle of Hypergamy-is-the-Female-Imperative play out in real time. Ladies and GentleDudes, I present to you…….Selena Gomez. Selena Gomez_YoungUnShe is the perfect modern example of someone that will never be able to be a faithful and loyal wife. She is currently 22 years old, smack dab in the middle of her prime, cute as a button, and could command the attention and commitment of almost any man that she wanted. So what is she doing? She’s giving her best to her on-again, off-again, Bad Boy boyfriend. The Bieber. She was supposedly, supposedly a virgin when they first got together, and she wore a purity ring…but of course that flew off of her finger the nanosecond she connected with Bieber.

Selena-Gomez-Purity-RingAnd of course it would, because she is literally living every little girl’s dream: she has a career, money, andSELENA VISITS JUSTIN ON SET! Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez embrace and kiss as she visits him on the set of his new music video 'Boyfriend' fame in both acting and music, but the cherry on top is that she is dating the hottest teen idol on the planet. The coolest of the cool kids. The one boy that every female under the age of 25 would die to be with, and she’s got him. At least sometimes.

She most likely gave him her virginity, he’s an out of control bad boy who can’t stay out of trouble more than 24 hours, he’s famous, popular on a global scale, and most likely cheating on her. In other words, he has every single tingle inducing quality that a woman would ever want. If this man is indeed her first love, we can predict Selena’s future; it’s going to be precisely the same as Shirley Jones’:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/07/24/shirley-jones_0_n_3647862.html

“If Jack hadn’t fully come to terms with my sexual boundaries before, after that night in Las Vegas with Jean, he now understood conclusively that threesomes were just not my thing. From then on, I assumed that he went his own way, sexually speaking, and, I guess, had threesomes with other women instead. I was still madly in love with him, and my awareness of his many infidelities, in whatever permutations he chose, didn’t tarnish my love for him. Nor did our threesome with Jean.”

Jones admits that she knowingly turned a blind eye to his many indiscretions.

“Off camera, in the real world, the Swinging Seventies were in full bloom, and Jack was determined to explore every aspect of the new sexual freedom. He wanted it all: swinging, pornography, drugs, group sex. I carried on just looking away and ignoring his infidelities.ABC's "Katie" - Season One

 “He was never able to be alone, so now he wanted me to take him back. I didn’t have to think too long about my answer. We had three children together, he was their father, and despite everything I still loved him. The psychiatrist I was then seeing told me that I was making a big mistake by taking him back: “You are never going to change that man. Don’t go back into this marriage thinking you can.” He was right, of course, but the Shirley Jones who had fallen so deeply in love with Jack Cassidy so many years ago wasn’t prepared to relinquish her dream man. And I didn’t.
This isn’t the first time Jones has opened up about her relationship with Cassidy, who died in a fire in 1976. She told newspapers in 1983 that if he were alive, she doubted that she would have ever married her second husband Marty Ingels, to whom she is still married.
“He wanted to come back (to me) right up to the day he died,” she said. “And as I realized later, I wanted him. That’s the terrible part. Much as I love Marty and have a wonderful relationship –- I’d say this with Marty sitting here –- I’m not sure if Jack were alive I’d be married to Marty.
Did ya catch all of that boys n’ girls? TEXTBOOK. Shirley Jones is 80 years old, and has never gotten over her philandering, abusive, bipolar, drug addicted first love. She even had the nerve to say in front of her current husband, that she’s only with him because her Bad Boy isn’t alive.
This is Selena Gomez’s future. Selena is ruined.
Thoroughly ruined in every single sense of the word. If she doesn’t marry Beaver, it’s over for her already. She’ll never bond, love, be faithful to, or sex up her subsequent rebound boyfriends the way she has given herself unreservedly to BieberBoy. And whoever she has kids by, if it’s not him, she will just be using that man for his resources to raise the kids, just like Lisa Whelchel did to her husband. Contemplating DivorceAnd she’ll find a reason that she’s not haaaaaapy and she’ll be gone on the first thing moving.
I’m hoping that men that have yet to fully ingest the Red Pill are paying attention. If you’ve been wondering why that pretty girl who did nothing but ignore you in high school and college is now attempting to reconnect with you on FaceBook, and seems to be pushing really hard for a relationship, it’s the surest possible sign that you are a Blue Pill Beta Provider. She does not love you, nor is she sexually attracted to you. She’s only with you because she couldn’t get the Bad Boy love of her life to commit to her. So she’s bringing you his babies to raise.
Women only have one shot to love the way we want them to…and that’s a girl’s first love. Left to her own devices, she will always spend that precious collateral on the worst man possible. It’s the reason that virgin brides have the lowest rate of divorce; they’ve actually saved themselves to bond with their husbands. If not, there will always be three of you in the relationship….the wife, the settled for husband, and the ghost of Alpha past.
Learn from Shirley Jones. And don’t fall in love with or marry a Selena.selena-gomez-purity-ring-2012

I’m not sure this is real. It’s starting to look like it’s not. But if this is real, this is what we’ve come to. A mother having a sexual relationship with her own daughter, looking for acceptance for their lifestyle.

http://www.thoughtsofajeanius.com/?p=22035

Here’s her Twitter, and listen to some of this stuff:

Vertasha and I fell in love by accident. It was never planned or even seen that way. I perform oral,we hold hands & kiss thats all.

Lets be clear i am disgusted by those dming about how to seduce their children. This is not about that. You are going to hell.

my daddy and I have a similar relationship! We support you!

 This is just a level of disgusting that I have a hard time finding words for.

Why do gay people get a pass? I demand equal rights for straight men. Let’s let Ana & Cenk tell the story first:Let’s examine some of these arguments verbatim:

Five WivesAt the top of the clip, Ana says: “For some people it’s easy to recognize what their sexuality is early on in life, but for others they don’t realize it until after they’re married.” ….So what if a man discovers that he’s polygynist in orientation and would much rather prefer a polygamist lifestyle? It’s acceptable for him to blow up his monogamous marriage to pursue his true self then, I must say.

At 0:30 we hear from Lauren Morelli, the writer at the center of the story. Let’s take her words and apply them to a man in a monogamous situation. “I realized I didn’t want to live a monogamous lifestyle in fall 2012, one of my first days on the set. It wasn’t so much one thing, but the sum of many details: how uncomfortable I’d feel around all of those hot actresses or how I considered myself a ‘not very sexual person.’ When considered alone, these seemed like little quirks that made me me. Wanting to have threesomes or more instead of having sex with just your wife is a perfectly reasonable preference to have, right? I was finally forced to consider a question that had never, ever occurred to me before: Holy sh*t, am I non-monogamous?”

At 2:17 Ana says the following: “I think the scariest thing is, I think that she probably thought, or had suspicions about her sexuality, right? But maybe she was afraid of it, fat_wife2maybe she didn’t want to address it or confront it, and imagine how scary that is to be in a relationship that you know you’re not happy in but you feel kinda trapped.” Let’s apply that to a man that has a 400 pound wife, and doesn’t have sex with her anymore because he gets nauseated just looking at her; the man realizes that he’s only attracted to thinner women. Or again, a man that realizes, after his nuptials, that the monogamous lifestyle is not for him. If he feels trapped, he most certainly shouldn’t have to stay, clearly.

At 2:53 Cenk says that “I think that she started writing for a show about lesbians in order to work out what she was feeling inside, and couldn’t quite put it into words until she put in the words of her character.” So….let’s say a straight male writer starts writing about a guy in high school, who’s surrounded by barely legal girls…he realizes that, even though he’s 40 and married to a 40 year old woman, he can’t seem to keep his mind off of 18 & 19 year old females. He discovers that he wants to only be with girls right 18 and 57out of high school through his cathartic writing.

Then Cenk makes this statement at 3:18: “To me the most amazing part of the story, putting all our goofy kidding aside, is that, how much societal pressure could shut down a person’s natural instincts, right? I mean, she was obviously attracted to women all along, but because of all the expectations and pressure, she so assumed that she must’ve been straight that she didn’t even consider being gay as an option, even though she had already made out with women….isn’t that amazing???” So, a straight non-monogamous guy, even though he’s juggled plates before, after he gets married, because of all the societal pressure and expectation was just assuming that manning up and getting married was who he was, and he didn’t even consider being polygamous as an option, even though he had already had multiple women before….isn’t that amazing???

And, at 4:01, Ana puts the cherry on top of the sundae: “And a lot of people are upset with her, because they feel like she broke up her marriage, and she didn’t work hard enough, and once you take your vows it’s supposed to be as serious as possible which I, look, when you get married, Non-monogamousyou should take your vows seriously, I’m not trying to belittle that, right, but at the same time, what did you want her to do? Remain married to a man she wasn’t in love with, and who she had absolutely no interest in having sex with?” A straight man who’s repulsed by his wife, does he get that same understanding/freedom? If she’s 400 lbs or just if he’s done with monogamy and ready to move on….he has those some options, correct?

There’s more gems in there, but I want to restate: I demand equal rights for straight men who realize after they’re married they do not want fatties, they only like 19 year olds, or they are just simply non-monogamous. In the video they said repeatedly, “This is different! She’s attracted to a whole other gender!” It’s different, really?

So, I’ll ask again: Why do Gay people get a pass? Archie

Not a blog this time for my favorite, but a video. Manospherians are quite familiar with The Sandman. I know this was released at the end of August, but I still wanted to feature it now, because it’s so powerful. Also because #WomenAgainstFeminism is still a thing. This video really speaks for itself: Also check it out on Sandman’s MGTOW site here. I really vibe with this sentiment, as I personally tend to have a long memory. I really hope that men never forget that women’s hypergamous strategy has been laid bare by Feminism, and you will never get her best.

So why should you give her yours?

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/09/10/ilich-guardiola_n_5799910.html 

 
 

A Texas drama teacher accused of having sex with one of his students has seen all charges against him dropped after he married the teen police had said was his victim.

Ilich Guardiola, 41, was initially questioned by police in April when he was stopped for a traffic violation while riding with the 16-year-old girl in his car. The teen eventually told authorities she was in love with Guardiola and they were in a relationship, according to KHOU.

Before authorities busted him in May for the improper relationship, Guardiola had flown to Las Vegas with the girl and married her with the teen’s mother as the witness, according to KPRC.

text_messageAuthorities said they found text messages between Guardiola and the girl, who was one of his students at the Houston Family Arts Center.

One of the texts allegedly sent by the girl to Guardiola said “I love having sex with you.”

Now, KHOU reports, that the sexual assault of a child charge against Guardiola has been dropped and his lawyer told the station it was because of the marriage.

The Houston Family Arts Center cancelled its contract with Guardiola after the accusations arose.

So…..wait.

It’s wrong to have sex with an underaged person because they are legally a child and cannot consent to sex. But if their parent consents to them getting married, they can get married. Why can’t the parent just say “it’s okay for this teacher to have sex with my daughter?” Also, they can consent as long as their partner is the same age.

Teens can’t handle sexual relationships because….errr….supposedly their brains aren’t developed enough to understand decision making and long term consequences. So we then give them CAR KEYS, because….um. Also, ye aforementioned retardo brain can’t handle the choice of sex but somehow CAN handle the responsibilities that come along with being someone’s spouse. Because the magic piece of courthouse paper says so. 

But then according to this map:Age of Consent

Age of Consent is a manmade construct. So the State gets to decide when your brain can handle sex with a partner that’s legally an adult?

But THIS guy: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2126366/Jordan-Powers-18-leaves-teacher-James-Hooker-41-student-sexual-abuse-claims.html

He’s still wrong even though the person was 18.

This whole topic always gives me a headache.

Candace Cameron has been married to an NHL player for seventeen years. Does anyone think that she’s struggling to submit in this case?

Whether Christian or not….women still want the same things. Because they are still wired the same way. There always seems to be, however, an effort among the religious to convince all others that their motivation is their love for God. Could that be true? Of course it could be, far be it from me to presume that I would know someone’s heart.

What I find strange and curious beyond belief, however, is that rarely do I see a woman’s desire to submit seem to hold up if her husband’s not an Alpha. If indeed her motivation is to obey Christ, it should be as the Bible teaches, submission to her husband, not just her Alpha husband.

lisa-whelchel-smiling-660Remember Lisa Whelchel, aka Blair Warner from The Facts of Life? She went from this: http://heavenlyhomemakers.com/chatting-with-lisa-whelchel-about-marriage

to this:  http://global.christianpost.com/news/lisa-whelchel-secretly-divorces-husband-after-23-years-81921/

…..so what gives?

I’ve got a new perspective.

The lie has once again been exposed as being the diametric opposite of the truth.

BetaGinas and White KnuckleHeads still make every effort to pedestalize females into these creatures that are “inherently morally superior” and “more self-controlled” and way more deeply spiritual than males are.

Yeah. Crap.

It’s the other way around, which is why most of the heroes in the Bible are men. Who’s more likely to be committed to their faith, regardless if there’s a pleasure component in it or not, and give their lives for what they believe? Men are. Who’s more likely to hang in there with a marriage that’s going south to try and salvage it? Men are. Who’s more likely to, just in general, take the tenets of whatever faith they daniel-1have more seriously? Men are.

I told you before men, you are the prize.

I’d link to a blog that I think may offer a counterpoint, and showcase women that are at least trying to make an effort to submit to their Beta husbands, but I’ve been asked not to. The husband of the wife that runs this blog, his words to me were, “my blog isn’t the kind of blog that they’d like to get traffic from.”

Hah.Man's World

More proof that Red Pill Truths are indeed accurate, Ravens running back Ray Rice is planning to address the media at 3 p.m. Friday for the first time since he was charged with knockingI give you exhibit 238392232nthX1239 to the umpteenth power, Janay Rice:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/09/09/janay-rice-response-instagram_n_5790160.html

janay rice

flushingSo, Manosphere articles, posts, blogs, and books can pretty much be summed up as always falling into one of three categories:

1) Female Hypergamy

2) The Male Need for Game

3) Watching 1) and 2) play out in real life

But I’m here to restate this question: How does it all end? Or, more accurately, what is the next Big Thing in male/female relations?

We’ve examined, over and over again, the actual and accurate basics of the Female Imperative. We’ve debunked, time and time again, the false claims of Feminism. More and more men are awakening to the Blue Bill Betaness inside of them, and realizing what their prospects are without nutting/Gaming up. More men are adopting some level of MGTOW, after seeing the awful deal that is Marriage 2.0. That’s not what I’m talking about right now. What I’m talking about now is, what will the next huge cultural shift be? What’s the future that results from all of this going to look like?

Will it be filled with frustrated Betas that finally decide to become MGTOW? Will there simply be less males in the world in NGWOTgeneral? Will the U.S. regress to an earlier time, like the return of Finishing School for women and male chivalry, or go extreme hardcore women-are-property like many countries in the Middle East? Or will enough men with enough power realize that shipping in beautiful wife trained women from other countries will shine an even greater light on how worthless the 21st century American female is? Or will we just go straight on Logan’s Run and say that nobody gets to live past the age of 30?

There aren’t really any stats that I’m aware of that track the number of married Beta men, as being a “Beta Man” isn’t an easily measurable demographic. So let’s look at this article from last year to examine the number of weddings in total:

http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation/2013/06/17/marriage-trends-demographics/2424641/

From 2007 to 2009, the number of marriages each year fell from 2.197 million to 2.080 million. The report estimates that more than 175,000 weddings have been postponed or foregone since the recession began.

Sociologist and demographer Wendy Manning, co-director of the National Center for Family & Marriage Research at Bowling Green State University in Bowling Green, Ohio, says the projected wedding increases “might be overly optimistic.”

“They seem to think the number of weddings is going to increase. That’s possible,” she says. But “not all those marriages are going to be among those young people entering into their first marriages. The report is focusing on the Echo Baby Boomers entering into their marrying years, which is true, but my issue is that one-third of marriages are remarriages, and the remarriages are not among the young people.”

A report based on 2010 data issued by her center last year found that 31% of all people who married that year were remarrying.

The new forecast predicts the marriage rate to remain at the record low of 6.8 marriages per 1,000 population for 2013 (where it’s been since 2009) and notes that the rate was 7.3 in 2007, just before the downturn. In addition, the report predicts that when these couples take their first vows, they’ll probably be older than brides and grooms in the past. By 2015, the company predicts, the average age at first marriage will rise to 29.2 for men and 27.1 for women, up from 28.2 for men and 26.1 for women in 2010.

 

6.8 marriages per 1,000 people, with most of the remarriages being among the young, with everybody pushing 30 before getting married, with same sex marriages stats not even being fully tabulated yet. And now, the number of divorces:

http://www.cdc.gov/nchs/fastats/marriage-divorce.htm

Marriage and Divorce

Data are for the U.S.

  • Number of marriages: 2,118,000
  • Marriage rate: 6.8 per 1,000 total population
  • Divorce rate: 3.6 per 1,000 population (44 reporting States and D.C.

That’s an astonishingly low number of people even braving the waters of marriage, with over half of them wanting out, with women initiating said outness 60-70% of the time:

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/homo-consumericus/201311/do-men-or-women-file-divorce-more-often

http://www.divorce-lawyer-source.com/faq/emotional/who-initiates-divorce-men-or-women.html

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/men/relationships/10357829/Why-do-women-initiate-divorce-more-than-men.html

So if we’re assuming a 5% Alpha Rate, that means that 2 million or so of these marriages(when factoring in Gammas and Deltas) are Beta Marriages. Everyone keeps claiming that the current climate is unsustainable, for genetic, social, and economic reasons(and yes I know those stats are not broken down by age or ethnic group). They say that neither Beta Men nor the State are going to be willing to keep furnishing women with all the rights, all the property, all the education, full control over the children, and all of the income forever, 042014_marrying_807with men paying the bill either through taxes, alimony, or child support.

So what’s the next step?

Every state rushing to legalize prostitution? Doubtful, but if you want to read an experienced perspective on that, check out The Honest Courtesan.

My personal feeling is that Polygamy will begin to surge in the U.S.; with women experiencing less and less available men, they will be more honest about their desire to share an Alpha Male than be stuck somewhere with a schlubbing Beta.

There also might be room for Marriage 3.0….something that on the surface seems more equitable for men, but again, it will be aimed primarily at the Beta Men still wanting to marry.

So what do Manospherians think? What will the next big Cultural Shift be?next-big-thing-ahead

 

katarina-kroslakova-49687Here is the original article:

Quit Hitting on Me and Help Me Out

In it, we see Katarina Kroslakova expressing her frustrations at the various male “peacocks” she finds on the 6am flights that are a regular part of her work schedule. And how their constant attempts at picking her up are both simultaneously esteem boosting and pathetic. She then goes on to describe her fascination with the apparent obituary reading over Chivalry:

Has anyone ever helped pop my bag up into the overhead compartment? Nope. Have I seen any other woman helped? Nope. This week, an engineer in his 50s just stood there in the aisle, his hands clasped, as I played Olympic weight-lifting with my suitcase right in front of him. Just stood there, looking intently at the sticky carpet. Probably afraid to chip a nail or something. Has the women’s liberation movement really scared the bejesus out of men this much? When did it become chivalrous to steadfastly look away and not bother to help? If a 6am flight is anything to go by, you’d think the concept of a gentleman was well and truly dead. I promise you, I won’t get angry or defensive or give you attitude, I’ll in fact be super-grateful and flash you an extra-big smile despite the lack of sleep. Which brings me to the final dismount. Even before the seatbelt sign goes off, the jackets get put on, the suitcases get territorially placed in the aisle, and the competitive rush to get off that plane begins. Of course, I’m left to struggle with my own bag. It’s not that I expect help, it’s just the harshness of it all I find a bit surprising. Unless your carry-on luggage contains an esky full of kidneys, I actually don’t think your meeting is more important than mine. And yet, I’m fascinated by this morning microcosm of high society.

My favorite Manosphere responses have been from Dalrock:

chivalry_is_dead_by_joeynwhite-d5wikwx“Articles like the above are interesting not because the author is so stuck in her own head she can’t see how absurd her childish demands are, but that her editor didn’t see the problem either.  It is also worth noting that Ms. Kroslakova’s problem isn’t that men are afraid of being useful to her, or even that this is a movement designed to teach women a lesson.  Her problem is that this is the entirely foreseeable cultural change feminists like her have been championing.”

And from Vox:

“Chivalry is dead, ladies. You killed it. It’s dead. You can vote and you can work and you can divorce now,  so shut the hell up and stop expecting men to protect you, provide for you, or even bothering to lift a finger for you. You wanted “equality” and you got it. As Instapundit correctly noted: ‘Chivalry was a system, which imposed behavioral obligations on women as well as on men. Women were happy to cast their obligations off, yet seem perennially surprised that men haven’t stayed exactly the same.‘ Ray Rice is the perfect image of equality in action. Based on the police summons of both the Baltimore running back and his fiance, his fiance hit him and Rice promptly hit her right back.

Is that what feminists wanted? Because that’s what they got, and they damn well deserve it too. Ideologies have consequences.

…be sure to read the comments as well. I co-sign almost every comment on Vox’s post.

My take on it is this:

make_me_sandwich2As I explained in more detail here, men will always respond to lines, rules, boundaries, honor, codes, and fair competition, and we desire more than anything else to understand the rules of the game that we’re playing. Well, here’s the answer. This is the situation that modern Feminism has created:

I am female. Whether girl or woman, chronologically or psychologically immature and undeveloped, or well into maturity, broken, damaged or whole, I deserve respect because of what I am….not because of what I do or do not do. I am your equal in every way, except when it comes to taking responsibility for my life, as I reserve the right of Universal Victim Status, to be invoked at any time. I have the right to use every natural, legal, and social advantage that I have to make my life better, especially at your expense, but males cannot use any of theirs, because anything that benefits a man is by definition oppression against women and misogynistic. I have identified Patriarchy as the source of all ills in my life, and since men are the problem, my solution is….to become more like them. I therefore will eschew all natural and social expectations of femininity and embrace aggressiveness, poor manners, questionable hygiene, butch haircuts, course language, and the freedom to have as many sexual encounters as I like, because men get to do it. And any opinion of my sexual choices, and any consequences thereof, shall be shouted down with a rousing chorus of the Female National Anthem, Don’t Judge Me. Finally all available resources belong to me by birthright, therefore the Federal, State, and Local Governments shall create extensive programs to help me succeed in life, to be funded primarily by male tax dollars, regardless of my own choices in the matter, and any man that accepts the legal status of husband relinquishes all rights to any resources in the marriage to me, in perpetuity, and yet I may always adopt the title of StrongIndependentWomanTM.

girlpower2Did you catch all that? Let me chart it out for you:

NEW

 GENDER

 REALITY

Women
Men
 
 TRAITS Advantage
Physical Strength Weaker, can use Stronger, cannot use Women
Verbal Strength Stronger, can use Weaker, cannot use Women
Sexual Strength Stronger, can use Weaker, cannot use Women
Economic Strength Equal to greater, can use Equal to weaker, cannot use Women
Social Strength Stronger, can use Weaker, can use only if Game Women
Legal Strength Stronger, can use Almost nonexistent, cannot use Women
Parent Strength Stronger, can use Almost nonexistent, cannot use Women
Marital/Divorce Stronger, can use Almost nonexistent, cannot use Women

Can you see it? This is the new Feministic definition of “equality.” And yet you’ve got a pretentious Wall Creeping privileged Femiphyte like Katarina Kroslakova, complaining about CHIVALRY, while clearly taking full advantage of this new Gender Reality system by retaining her “maiden” name(a long outdated term) 794061-michael-smith-and-katarina-kroslakovawhile enjoying her husband’s resources, and yet still complaining about married life:

Needless to say, I didn’t change my name to Katarina, um, Smith. Then, less than three months after our wedding, Michael went away to film a documentary. In Mogadishu, Somalia. With no communication options. The day he flew out, my car got flooded and written off. Problems piled up. 

I doubt there is a chapter called “Dealing with Disruptive Events” in the Marriage for Dummies book. There should be, as that cozy little bubble bursts pretty quickly. Even within the first year of marriage, the age-old saying of what first attracts you later drives you mad will ring true. Six years ago I loved Michael’s vocabulary. As a journalist, I found that very attractive. He’s “Mr Big” in my phone, as a Sex and the City reference to his command of the English language. Now, if he gratuitously shoves an avoidable big word into a conversation, I simply raise a single eyebrow. Six years ago I loved our constantly exciting life of launches, lunches, dinners, dates, functions, flights. Now, I crave cheap Thai takeaway and a Bridesmaids DVD. But what marriage does is transform your relationship from that intense, mad whirlwind into your lovely, unique version of what romance and partnership is. 

This year for Valentine’s Day, we ate takeaway fish and chips in the park across the street. Just him and me, perched on the pavement, greasy paper on our good clothes, sticky slippery fingers holding on to plastic cups of white wine. For this week’s first – paper – anniversary, I was given Tom Ford stilettos and Michael a bottle of Grange. Wrapped up in paper, sure. I’m only a baby in marriage years, but I’ve learnt a lot. When I read about Hollywood stars describing how hard they worked on their marriage, I thought, “You’re so full of it”. Now I find myself on the same bandwagon. So, do I have any marriage secrets? Don’t play guessing games – help the dude out and say what you want. Subtlety is overrated. Don’t pick his clothes up off the floor. He will run out of clean underwear eventually and find the laundry basket. Get a regular cleaner. It’s the best $50 you’ll ever spend. Buy a cookbook with dishes that are full of flavour and simple to prepare. Nigella Lawson has made me seem like a culinary genius. Say thank you a lot, and say you’re proud of each other’s achievements. Pick up each other from the airport. Get a strong support network. A quick whinge to your mum or girlfriend can be most soothing: “I know, men are such total bastards!” Do I have any advice for men? Pick up your crap off the floor, buy flowers and tell your missus she looks beautiful every single day.

Chivalry is not only deservedly dead, but the day is coming when enough men will finally see that a reckoning is long overdue.

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mr2dx